The Easiest Way To Organically Remove Dandelion Weeds From Your Garden

Oh, what to do about the evil lurker known, properly known as Taraxacum Officinale? Never mind that dandelion greens are an amazing source of Vitamin A and beta-carotene, and are also rich in Vitamins B, C, D, calcium, iron and other minerals. Ignore that dandelion roots are used in natural medicine as an appetite stimulant, digestive aid, and diuretic. They are horrible nasty little bits of nature that find their way into every nook and cranny of our lawns and gardens. Have you seen the bright yellow flowers they produce in spring? Disgusting!

I treat these noxious little buggers exactly the way they deserve to be treated. Here's my simple process for dandelion weed management the organic way:

Step 1: Assemble your tools - basket, gloves, and scissors/pruners.
Step 2: Step outside, saying loudly to yourself and any neighbors who may be listening, "I AM GOING TO THE GROCERY STORE NOW!"
Step 3: Pull the dandelion up at the base, getting as much of the root as you can. You won't get it all and it hardly matters. Cut off the root and flower stem for the compost pile. Put the flower tops and leaves in the basket.

Congratulations! You've organically removed dandelions from your lawn, and they are halfway read to be put in a pot. "Not fair!" you say. "They will grow back from the root that's left in the ground!" you say. True indeed, but you missed my point. I promised you information on the easiest way to remove "dandelion weeds" from your garden organically. And the easiest way to do that is to rename them "dandelion greens" and call them dinner. Done and done. However, if that does not satisfy you, I suggest you check out this article by radio garden host guru Mike McGrath consisting of actual lawn management tips for dandelion control.

As for those of you who are still reading, I leave you with Tom's basic dandelion (or any other kind of) greens recipe. Last week he made a homemade ricotta gnocchi in a sauce of dandelion greens, shiitake mushrooms and Parmesan cheese - but didn't write down the recipe. When I can get him to recreate it, I'll do another post. In the meantime, here's another great website. Wildman Steve Brill tours, lectures and writes all about foraging for wild foods. Here are a few more of his dandelion recipes. The very first leaves of spring dandelions can be eaten raw or lightly sauteed, but they get progressively more bitter as they get older. The recipe below includes boiling the greens first, which helps soften the stronger late season flavors. Although I haven't tried them yet, googling the phrase "dandelion fritters" will lead you many recipes for battered and deep fried dandelion flowers. Enjoy!

Dandelion Greens Sauteed in Olive Oil and Garlic

2 C. packed dandelion greens, washed and chopped
1/4 C. olive oil
1 garlic clove, sliced or minced
salt, pepper, red pepper to taste

Bring a large pot of water to boil and add salt. Thoroughly wash and pack dandelion greens. Add to boiling water and simmer for about five minutes until the leaves turn bright green. Immediately move greens to an ice water bath to retain the color and continue rinsing. (The boiling and rinsing helps remove the compounds that cause excessive bitterness, especially in dandelion greens that have already produced a flower). Let rest, and add olive oil to a saute pan turned on medium heat. Add garlic and red pepper and saute for a few minutes to release flavor but before garlic browns. Squeeze water out of the dandelion greens and add to saute pan to continue cooking until completely wilted, about 5 to 10 minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste.

Garden Like MacGyver: Seed Starting On the Cheap

The answer is "no" to my 80's reference friends who wonder if I will be teaching you how to make a groundhog-killing bomb with duct tape, matches and a q-tip. But why not use Richard Dean Anderson's beloved character as a source of inspiration for taking those garden supply marketers to task? "Buy these exotic seeds to grow under this elaborate and overpriced lighting system! Grow your seeds in these exact containers using expensive supplies that look suspiciously like crap you have sitting around your house!" Would RDA fall for that? Hell, no! He would have solved the problem, got the girl, and started rolling the credits before you could say "additional charges apply due to shipping weight."

I admit, nothing beats the thrill of that first credit card swipe of the season, especially if you are like me and feel that buying said supply is almost the same as completing the project. But all these little doo-dads and accessories add up fast, and many of them are convenient but unnecessary. Here are some of my favorite ways to re-purpose household stuff for use in your early spring gardening projects.

Instead of buying: Ultimate Seed Cart by Territorial Seed Company - $900 + shipping

Build your own from Home Depot supplies:
plastic slotted utility shelving $35
3 4'long fluorescent shop lights plus bulbs $50
twine $3

OK, so mine is uglier. I admit it. But you're growing seeds, not entering a beauty pageant. Plus with the money you save, you could go to the spa ten times and then enter yourself in a beauty pageant. So there.

Instead of: Seed Starting Kits by Jiffy, Burpee, etc. - $10 and up


Use from the recycling bin:
1.) Blueberry and Strawberry plastic domed containers, and aluminum foil baking trays or pie plates OR
2.) replace the berry containers with egg cartons, yogurt cups or last year's seed trays plus plastic wrap


The key to seed starting is creating a warm humid environment, which is why mass produced kits contain a waterproof bottom tray, a perforated seed cell tray, and a clear plastic dome. The same growing conditions can be created with any kind of catch tray on the bottom, and the berry container, which is the seed tray and dome in one. I like these for lettuce mixes and herbs that grow as a patch as opposed to an individual plant. For plants that may need to be transferred to bigger pots before being put in the garden, like tomatoes, use the egg cartons or small yogurt cups with drain holes punched in. This will help protect the root systems during transfer. Cover with the plastic wrap to keep in the moisture until the seeds germinate.

Instead of: Seedling Heat Mat - $20 and up, depending on the size and brand name

Use from around the house: a regular old heating pad

Some seeds, like peppers, need a heat boost to germinate. A heating pad won't have the bells and whistles of a mat made only to germinate seeds, but it will get the job done. And then when you throw your back out planting those peppers, you can watch it all come back full circle. Cool, huh?

Instead of: Adorable Victorian Bell Cloches - $10 to outrageous, depending on size and material

Use from the recycling bin: 2 liter soda bottles with the bottom cut off

Is it ugly? Yes. Is it effective? You betcha! Just like a cloche, the soda bottle makes a mini greenhouse environment and protects the plant from pests. Unscrew the top for air venting. AND when you're done using the soda bottle as a greenhouse, turn it upside down and jam the spout into the dirt at the base of a newly planted perennial or shrub. Fill it water, and let the plant drink the way it wants to - a lot, but slowly. Then, put down the hose, get your own drink, and water yourself at whatever rate and in whatever amounts you choose. Congratulations! You've figured out how to water your plants while doing nothing.

Finally, if you're looking for a way to manage all those seed packets, consider a regular photo album with plastic pockets, like so. With this system, you can alphabetize and organize to your anal retentive heart's content, and still make it fit nicely on a shelf when you're done.
It's possible that the only thing of interest you learned from this entire article is that the carpet in my office is a lovely shade of pink. That's fine. I simply encourage you to do your own MacGyvering the next time you take on a garden project. It can't hurt to save money, save something from a landfill, and save the spirit of his moving theme song from obscurity while you're at it. Thanks, YouTube!

Go Ahead, Anger the Snow Gods - Grow Lemongrass As a Houseplant

Since just muttering the verb form of the word “garden” seems to result in a massive snow assault hailing from our angsty northeastern skies these days, I’m going to have to go ahead and change the name of that act for the purposes of this article. Instead of covering topics related to doing-that-thing-where-you-put- seeds- in- the- ground, I’m going to discuss safer subjects until St. Patrick’s Day when I can hopefully push the snow aside and behave-in- a- supportive- manner- so- as- to- help- small- plants- get- big. You see, if the angry snow monsters who live in the sky think we have lost all hope of ever seeing green grass again, maybe they will think they have won and will relax long enough to take naps, or play a round of dominoes, or do ANYTHING AT ALL other than cause weather forecasters to invent new and creative words to describe way too damn much snow.

That brings me to one of my favorite winter activities – buying lemongrass from the grocery store or Asian food market, using what you need for your recipe, and turning the rest into a houseplant. Lemongrass is, you guessed it, a grassy full-sun plant that grows in zones 9-11 and is essential to Thai cooking. Although it's a bit exotic for your average grocery store, you can find it sold as a somewhat dried stalk in Asian food markets or specialty stores.

Try to buy the freshest stalks with lots of green color and thick bottoms. Even though it looks a bit dried and dead when you buy it, peeling off the outer grass layers will reveal small growth nodes at the base of the plant. All you have to do is use those outermost layers for cooking, trim down the top of the stalk, pop it in a glass of water for a few weeks and wait until a decent root systems establishes. Move it to a pot with a drain hole and indoor potting soil. That’s it! In our zone 6 weather, you can keep it as a houseplant until summer, and then move it to your deck ... or you can even do-that-thing-where-you-dig-a-whole-and-then-take-the-plant-and-put-it-in-there!

DISCLAIMER: My cats take to lemongrass like a frat boy to a keg of Milwaukee's Best. Unless you feel like cleaning up after a feline that can't hold down his or her own herbal refreshments, I suggest you keep your plant out of harm's way.

Here's my hopeful lemongrass with a backdrop of angry snow monster wrath:

And here's my two year old plant, which got started the same way in winter I moved it outside for the summer when I did- that- thing- that- we- all- know- but- won't- be- discussing, and then moved it back inside for the winter.

So go ahead and turn your groceries into plants. Thanks for reading, and happy you-know-what!

From the Cockamamie Schemes Files: Homemade Avocado Moisture Scrub

What's a zone 6 gardener to do in the dead of winter? Good gardeners read new plant books, clean and organize tools, and start shopping from the deluge of seed catalogues that start arriving the second the ball drops. I plan on doing all that too. Soon. But January gardening prep for me is generally comprised of cockamamie schemes and elaborate plans; Thanks to nature, I don't actuallly have to DO anything. Why not take advantage of the vacation time, and turn to other topics?

Forever on my to-do list is this line: "Make natural beauty treatments and home remedies." It's always on the list but I never get around to doing it during prime gardening season. This year might be different though, due to a combination of the plants I bought last year at Well Sweep Herb Farm and my subscription to Herb Companion Magazine. Unfortunately, my herb garden is asleep and I want to start my project now. Thanks to Shop Rite and my love of Mexican food, I finally made my first official home beauty treatment with hilarious, disgusting and ultimately positive results.


Avocado Moisture Scrub

(from "The Herbal Home Spa" by Greta Breedlove)



2-3 fresh avocado pits

1 C. water, milk or yogurt

(makes 1 treatment)



I let the pits air dry for a few days, then gave them a few good whacks with a meat mallet. From there I moved them to our regular food processor for a rough grind, and then a spice mill for a finer grind. I think you could go right to the spice mill from the smashing, if you like. Mix the avocado pits with the base of your choice, and you have yourself an exfoliating, moisturizing face and body scrub. Apply, leave on for 10 minutes, and wash off. Those are the basic instructions from the book. But let me tell you exactly how it worked for me, as well as some important lessons learned.

One, unless you like freezing temperatures, let the stuff come up to room temperature before application. Second, please note that this is a gloopy mess, and prepare accordingly. Third, it turns out that, at least for the variety I purchased, avocado pits become orange once pureed. Perhaps you can see where I'm going with this.

I started out applying the scrub as a face mask while over the sink. Not good. Giant orange gloop drops all over the sink. So I threw a towel down and continued, but to no avail. The gloop had migrated beyond the towel and was leaving orange splotches on the rug and floor. I hopped into the tub (where I should have been in the first place) and resumed scrubbing the arms and legs. The entire tub area promptly became a full fledged mess with orange splatters on the floor and wall; The tracks left by my moving feet made it look like someone has been naked wrestling with the Great Pumpkin. However, there was no turning back at this point as I was almost completely orange by then and busy wondering just how long ten minutes actually is. I probably lasted most of the ten minutes, and the shower afterward was a sweet reward ... although that water seemed to be moving down the drain awfully slowly. Ah, yes. One of those plastic drain covers would have been in order PRIOR to the water being run. Time to look on the bright side: the drain was always slow, the bathroom needed to be cleaned anyway, and this is some good blog fodder.

As I observed my orange path of destruction across the bathroom, I came to the following assessment: It was worth it. The scrub was amazingly soft for an exfoliator and putting it on was like getting a lumpy massage. I hate those sugar body scrubs because they feel like they are just scratching the skin. It really really worked as a moisturizer too, and it would probably make a great hair mask. And since I can't find any other use for an avocado pit except sprouting it to make a houseplant, it's a perfect solution for using an unusable item. In the future, I believe I will halve the recipe and use it as a hair/hand/face mask instead of a full body scrub disaster.

Am I daunted by being forced into cleaning a bathroom I had no desire to clean? Am I giving up my DIY pharmacy dreams? No! There's a whole internet full of weirdos just like me dishing out recipes for this kind of stuff. And if you are one of those weirdos and have a homemade concoction for me to try, email me at laurasglassart@verizon.net.